i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
My feet surprised me
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
