Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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