My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
