I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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