beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
