Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
