In the future we'll all be gay
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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