I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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