good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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