meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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