we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
