Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
