Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
