He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
i think my cat just said my name.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
