This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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