Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
