More tranny stories later!
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
