im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
