My nipple is on Facebook.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
