I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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