I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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