Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize