I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
