Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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