I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Randomize
