apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
