I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
The feeling are messing with the penis
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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