At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
