watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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