small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
