My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
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