My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Randomize
