if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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