she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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