I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize