Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
