dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Randomize
