the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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