He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
