I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Randomize
