real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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