They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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