I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm at about main and main street
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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