I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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