Don't you send me to vm
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
