I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
