Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
