Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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