can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Randomize
