okay pat passed out under dana's car
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
